Home is where you make it
Here I go again I try to make time for my diary because hey it helps to get all the stuff out my head trying to stay focused is a hard task I think or I know Im ADHD but I can focus on certain things. I sleep then wake up but it dosent help me.
Everybody is going through the same cycle in this place. We spinning our wheels in this. Who would have thought that this would be my life forever. In my eyes this place and places like it will be my home for a very long time Home is where you make it then eternity remains in this little hell in a box. I walk daily to keep my self busy and to think how I want or need to think.
I was homeless at least 3 times in my life its not a very good thing but it taught me how to be humble about alot of things people take for granted. We are all victims of our own making. Thats to think that god planned this for me.
I keep going over all my past flaws and dumb mistakes to understand why this had to be the ending point. I told myself once I finished my 7 year sentence that was it with police and jailhouses now look at me 50 or 40 years I cant pull that its have or 85 precent of that like my life might be over but nobody can understand my pain.
My wife is here but I dont think she understands the facts yes I believe she can be here and will be here but is it worth it this place and places like it are my home. May god bless me to be strong enough to deal with this like a man.
Nobody understands the pain I go through daily just to keep myself happy Freedom aint what its made out to be any ways but still I wish I could have had it. I think one day I will get it but it wont be what I expect it to be freedom is a inside you feeling you get to have it to own it but any ways welcome to my home where I try to make the best of it.
With the world going crazy out there how do us ‘Felons’ deal with our lives? Im gonna try to give you an inside key to all this but its not easy to hear or for me to write. I have to think about the outcome and force the words out my head into my hand and this black pen. Welcome to my home.
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