How Are Your Words?
By: Eric Smalley
When you speak to people or about people, are your words constructive or destructive? It’s important to know the difference between the two. When your building something, you are “constructing” something. However, when you are demolishing something, you are being destructive. So it is with words. What we say and how we say them can either be uplifting (constructive) or hurtful (destructive). The word of Elohim (God) says in the book of Ya’aqob (James) 3:10, “Out of the same mouth proceed berekah (blessing) and cursing. My brothers, this should not be so.” And this is very true! Everyone of us has used words to bless others or curse others. So, its very important to learn how to properly use our words.
“So too the tongue is a little member, yet boasts greatly. See how a little fire kindles a great forest!” (Ya’aqob 3:5). Not to poke fun at little people, but you ever realize it’s usually the smaller guy talking like he’s ten feet tall? Well, that’s how our tongue is. A small member of our body but talks like its the largest member. Did you know, if our tongue were to be removed from our mouths, it would be very hard to talk? If we have problems with being destructive with our words, then maybe we should practice not saying anything at all. Pretend you have no tongue! My parents used to tell my brother and me, “If you have nothing nice to say, dont say anything at all.” In other words, “If your words are destructive, keep them to yourselves.”
“But no man is able to tame the tongue. It is unruly, evil, filled with deadly poison.” (Ya’aqob 3:8). I believe James says this because he knows our flesh gets in the way of our spirit. Scripture even says the heart of man is wicked. We say things out of anger, resentment, spite, hate, or frustration all the time. As a Believer, I know Im not perfect. I fall every day in YHWH’s glory by my words and actions. Many, many times in my life has my tongue been “unruly, evil, filled with deadly poison”. I’ve said things I dont mean. I’ve said things to people I’ve later regretted. And when studying Scripture about the tongue, I realized how destructive it can be.
So, what can be done once we have already done damage? Mattithyahu (Matthew) 5:23-24 says, “If, then, you bring your gift to the alter, and there remember that your brother holds whatever against you, leave your gift there before the alter, and go, first make peace with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” These are the words of Yashua telling us how to fix a broken relationship. In the case of this study, its our words that has caused brokenness to take place. What Yashua is telling us to do is, go and make amends by seeking and receiving and even giving forgiveness. This is the healing factor in any and all situations. If you can use your words to destroy, you can also use them to build up.
In conclusion, love between one another through the Messiah who loved us first, can keep the peace from destruction. If you hurt somebody with your words, go and apologise to that person and use your words to heal. Our words are to edify and build people up. We are to strengthen each other with our words. Love is the key to uplifting words. In love, Yashua used is last words in death for His Father (YHWH) to forgive those who persecuted Him and put Him on the stake. He could have easily cursed them with His dying breath. But, instead He showed love, mercy and forgiveness. He showed grace. It’s not impossible to use your words in a constructive way. Be as Yashua was and still is with your words. Make it your practice to say kind and loving words. And lastly, make it your goal to go day by day to lift someone up by using your words. It can be done, so there’s no excuse. Shalom!
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