The Writing Of Richard L.Tabler:to the A.P.W.A.Page One.
Trying to have one good night of sleep is impossible within prison walls regardless of where in prison you are,it's just not possible.
I find that the things that have started to piss me off the most in life within these walls are the other things that other inmates find to talk about or a better word would be not to talk about.When are people going to grow up and stop crying and pointing the finger everywhere else,but at themselves? I feel that it's only right and proper for the facts to be told about whatevér is being spoke about and not just a one sided conversation,you know what
I mean?Sure,sure some of you are shaking your heads going,I know that's right.I think that it would be easier for those of you in society that are reading this to believe what is being said when it's coming from a convict that is doing the time,but that is also for the correctional officer's and not only the inmates.
Lastnight,(November,4th,20l7)I was off in never,never land trying to sleep,when this dumbass starts hollering and bitching about how they're screwing us over by making the cell over for an inmate that has evén gotten to death row yet nor is even at a Texas prison yet.This inmate down stairs is yelling cause his old ass got drunk on some home made hooch,and is waking everyone up screaming about how the officer's are fucking this guy over and he's not even here yet.I'm thinking to myself who caresl? Just shut the fuck up and let me sleep already! Do I get to go back to sleep?
Hell no! This old fart calls out to me and say's,Hey Slim! Oakland
Slim! (That's one of my nicknames)I get my butt outta bed and come to my door,and say,Yol What's up old school!? Being that he is drunk he already forgot that he called me out and to my cell door,and now he's cursing me telling me that he don't want to talk to me and that these pigs are fucking over this guy that's coming,ect,ect...
So/reading all that crap above to this point here and now.This is what I have to say about that topic,and I feel that you each need to be told about it.To each his/her own/right? We each make our own beds and therefore we have to lay in what we make or in the hole that we dig for ourselv%s.The inmate who is coming to live at this prison some time very soon is named Billy Tracy
Page Two of Richard L.Tabler's
Writing To The A.P.W.A. not that the Texas Department of Criminal Justice is yelling out and telling everyone,hell the guy is still going to trial,but he will be coming to stay on this Unit and on this building that houses Texas Death Row,regardless of if he get's a death sentence or not.You might think this to be harsh like that old fart down stairs,but let me assure you that it is not.You would think that when someone is sent to prison for whatever reasons he/SHE will do whatever it takes to get out of prison and not come back right?
Not so with this inmate i've been hearing about.Billy Tracy took the life of an officer at another prison here in Texas by beating the officer to death with the food slot bar.There is no reason that you can give me for taking the life of another person.I myself am still angry at myself for the lives I took that landed me on Texas Death Row,I will forever hate myself for this action.
Now in my opinion this is between Billy and the State of Texas and I could really care less how they decide to treat him,but what made me decide to say fuck this dude and everything that he stands for,is the fact that he raped a female nurse out at another prison as well before he killed this officer.You see,i'm all for the Death Penalty in certain cases.If you are a child molseter or a sexual violent predator,then they should execute youlbut they shouldn't do it through the lethal cocktail as they are now doing.No.They should take the guilty out in one of these fields and do the deed slowly and inflict the most possible pain.
Why should the condemned be executed painlessly? What about the child that was raped and killed? What about the women raped and left to live or the ones that do die?How do you think that they each felt? The problem insociety is that most are fast to point out about how bad the prisoners are being treated,but I ask you all to take a huge step back and look at it from all angles.I mean shit here I am on Death Row and i'm telling you this.I put myself in this place not anyone else.However I am being treated there is good reason for it even though most the times I may nor agree with it all,i'm man enough to tell you that i'm guilty of what i'm on death row for.In order for I or anyone else found in my situation to move forward we must own up to our actions.
From day one I have taken full responsibility for my actions
Page Three of Richard L.Tabler's
Writing To The A.P.W.A. and the things that taking that responsibility has brought me.That's mine and though I don't like it not one bit,nobody else can own up to it for me.Some people like Old School hide their issues by getting drunk or taking their problems out on others.To me this is the cowards way out of life.For people like Billy Tracy
I might have been able to look past the death of the officer,but
I cannot look past the fact that he raped a woman.Some people have to draw the line somewhere and I draw that line at taking the life of a child or raping children or women for any reason!
I have a mother,sister and niece and I have female friend's who have children and I have friend's within these prison walls that are both officer and medical staff,and I can tell you this,if someone did to one of them like Billy Tracy did to that nurse,you wouldn't have to worry about the state killing him,I would do it for free and i'd make him regret the day he was born before
I was finished with him.So,do I feel sorry for Billy Tracy and the cell that is being made just for him?No and not just no but
Allow me not to end this writing on such a bad topic and close with a poem I wrote years ago.This is for the fella's who are wanting to make their girl feel special or for the girl wanting to make her guy or her girl feel special.To each his/her own.:)
"When you & I are far apart
Can sorrow break your tender heart.
I love you darling yes I do,
Sleep is sweet when I dream of you.
All you are is a blooming rose;
Night is near so I must close
You shall find a question there..."
If you are working on an APWA-related project, please let us know how you plan to utilize the Archive. We hope to share information about your work with our readers and, whenever possible, with relevant APWA authors.
APWA is an open access archive. We encourage use of the writings for research, course planning, and projects engaged in examination of the criminal legal system. Reproduction of essays in their entirety infringes on author copyright without their explicit consent from the writers. Please contact us if you plan to reproduce entire essays; we will do our best to put you in contact with the authors for consent, and their compensation for any project that is profit making.