Writing to my inner child

Sierra, Dennis J.

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Writing to my inner child By: Dennis Sierra I When I decided to seek therapy, I knew that I needed to synthesize my unconscious thoughts with my conscious reality. It was suggested that I could write a letter to my inner child. I suspected that writing to my inner child could invoke many different emotions. It took me over a year to do just that. During the writing of my inner child, I needed to take intermittent breaks to gathermy thoughts and emotions. As I kept writing I felt compassion for my inner child. After completing this letter, I went about my day; suddenly I experienced a deep catharsis. It was if a white—hot blade pierced my soul, and I felt the agony of my past memories flow through my psyche. This exercise was spiritually cleansing! I was able to begin to forgive myself and allow myself to release the trauma of my past and find substance in many of my childhood memories. I thank all of you who suggested I complete this exercise. The following is the letter to my inner child: Dear Dennis, I am writing to the child who was abandoned by mother and father, the kid who lived with fear of the next unknown, who had feelings of longing for mom and believing that someday she would return. You’re the child who became confused by the oddities of life and the strangers encountered, still seeing pictures in your mind’s- eye, so vivid, revealing the pain of abandonment ignored. You remember the quiet peace of solitude mixed with fear when you ran away from the torment of the foster—system, the child predators, the authoritative parenting, and the cold walls of institutions. You kept yourself partially sane by the belief that your mother would someday find you and take you away from the seemingly insidious world that you lived in. Through all of the pain of your memories, you still see the child, skin bronzed by the summer—sun, innocently playing hide-and—seek with your friends. The boy who loved to pretend to be Speed Racer, the child who loved to listen to the music of the Beetles and Elton John, the kid who loved to play the flute and the recorder, go‘ hiking in the forest, swimming in the ocean, just being a kid. Dennis, you survived the foster~system, your drug addiction, prison, and most importantly, you survived your own self-destruction. You have learned to seek a higher purpose, to find empathy where you could not. You have reinvented yourself and turned your pain into healing bonds of love. You have only to forgive yourself and to find that little child, skin bronzed by the summer—sun, the little boy inside the I1’1211’1. By understanding the feelings of anger and resentment are at times caused by being abandoned, shamed, and rejected, you empathize with people and understand the human condition. Remembering your past has helped you develop into the creative and compassionate person you are today. You are known by some to be a person who heals and not hurts others, and has a way of inspiring peace. Now it’s time to forgive you. You have revisited the child you once were only to find the man you were destined to be. Written with love, Your older you. Dennis Sierra 5-22-2019

Author: Sierra, Dennis J.

Author Location: California

Date: May 22, 2019

Genre: Essay

Extent: 2 pages

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